My psychological addiction to smoking is incredible. I am filled with fear and a complete panic when I just contemplate quitting smoking.
I started smoking when I was 14 years old and I had heard everyone (including my mother that was a smoker) telling me that it is highly addictive and I must not try it. Who listens to that anyway? Of course I won’t become addicted, it just won’t happen to me right?
But it did. I started off smoking like most teenagers do, in groups to be cool. I remember clearly the day I first had a cigarette on my own. I remember that little voice in the back of my head telling me that hey this can’t be good, this is all wrong. That was the day I became a nicotene addict. It was not even a year down the line before I was hooked on a packet of cigarettes a day.
Is Marijuana the Gateway Drug or is Nicotine?
People are always saying that Marijuana is the gateway drug, the one that leads people off the beaten path to harder drugs. I’m not so sure about that. I wonder if perhaps cigarettes and alcohol is actually the problem? Both are reasonably socially accepted. Yes smoking is frowned upon by many, but nobody is going to arrest you or completely shun you for smoking a cigarette or drinking a glass of wine now are they?
Fear of Quitting Smoking
I read a book a while back, called Alan Carr’s Easy Way to Quit Smoking. It was a great read and it covers all the fears smokers have. I am terrified of not having my cigarettes. I have been smoking for 22 years and can’t imagine my life without my cigarettes. I keep thinking how my life will be worse without smoking. This of course makes no sense whatsoever does it?
I mean come on, I am blowing money daily on cigarettes, I stink, I am always trying to run away from my children to sneak outside to poison my body. Exactly in what way is my life going to be worse without cigarettes? Will I maybe miss that morning smoking cough?
Logically I cannot think of a reason to keep smoking. Everything is pointing me to quit but I just cannot get over the psychological addiction of smoking. The physical cravings will be bad I am sure, but the mental pain scares me.
The truth is I feel like an idiot, I feel like it is too much to quit smoking. Not even giving up drinking and drugs was this scary for me.
Perhaps that is part of the problem. This was my first drug and I have given up everything else, so maybe it makes me want to hold on tighter to the only addiction I have left?
How to Quit Smoking?
My husband also smokes and he has tried the nicotine patches, changing to smoking cigars instead of cigarettes and getting prescribed medication from our doctor. He believes the way to quit is through nicotine replacement therapy.
My husband has been great with trying to quit and he has managed a few times to stop smoking for a period of time. Unfortunately he has never managed to stay stopped.
I have never truly made an effort ever to quit smoking. I believe that it can be done through applying the 12 Step Program and without any nicotine substitutes. I have applied Step 1 to my smoking very easily, there is certainly no denial left about the fact that I am addicted to cigarettes and that it has caused damages in my life. I have made the decision to stop and I must now just do it.
The Decision to Quit Smoking
Yes I have decided to quit smoking. My husband and I are quitting at the end of September. I hope we are successful and I hope to be able to share my experience with this and what goes on in my head during this time.
So please check back for my success story in a few weeks and feel free to give me some feedback as I go along, I am sure I will be needing plenty of motivational and inspiring comments to keep me amped for this scary journey!